“Come, let me drink to you, Boss Liu. Boss Liu, guess what kind of table you're sitting at today. Eighteen successful imperial-exam candidates have eaten at this table. Hundreds of years old. Passed down from the Ming dynasty. Come, come, especially you, Mum, and the little one—everyone can give it a touch, pick up a little good fortune. Boss Liu, now guess what kind of liquor I've poured you today. This one is worth a bit of money. Homemade snake liquor. This snake's head has been soaking for more than a year. See that mountain behind the house? The snake came from that mountain. Guess who caught it. I caught it myself. I was up there chopping firewood that day. Halfway up, I saw this enormous snake. Hah, I thought, that's a big snake. So I grabbed it by the head and brought it home, split open the belly, took out the gallbladder and dropped it into the liquor. Sorry about the snake's gallbladder—that went into my own belly.

“Boss Liu, I saw you put away six liang in one go. Excellent capacity! Which is why I must drink to you again. Not boasting, but I used to be able to drink just like you. These days, though, not a drop passes my lips. So I'll have to toast you with water. Boss Liu, guess when I gave up alcohol. 1988. Now guess why I don't touch a drop. There's a story behind that.

“I was in my early twenties, not long out of school in the village. I'm not boasting. I wouldn't say I was the best drinker among my classmates, but I wasn't bad. One morning I was walking to the entrance of the village when a tractor driver called me over. Early in the morning, mind you. He says, Young man, come here, come here. Drink with me. Back then, Boss Liu, you know how it was: a man who drove a tractor had money. He invited me over. I would have been embarrassed to refuse.

“So I sit down and watch him open a bottle for himself and glug-glug-glug the entire thing into a bowl. Boss Liu, that liquor was strong. I thought the two of us were splitting it. He says, What are you doing? This bottle's mine. If you want a drink, get your own from over there. I was embarrassed to refuse, Boss Liu, so I got a bottle from the side and opened mine too. Not one mouthful of congee lining my stomach. You know what that means. Means the liquor is going to do you damage.

“All right, we gulp down a bowl each. Then he gets up, taking his sweet time, walks over and opens another bottle. He says, Little brother, my mum told me to go up the mountain and chop firewood today. I don't want to, so I came here for a little drink first. He pours his next bottle into the bowl. I say, Big brother, why don't we split it? He says, What are you doing? This bottle is mine. If you want to drink, get one yourself. I'll pay.

“I couldn't very well say no, Boss Liu. Nothing in my stomach but liquor, Boss Liu. So I take another bottle, pour it into the bowl, and drink with him. We keep at it until we've had two or three jin each. Two or three jin first thing in the morning, Boss Liu. Both of us out of our minds. Then the tractor driver staggers to his feet and says, I'm going up the mountain to chop firewood.

“Later the villagers told me how he came back down. Four people carried him. His legs hung over them, soft as rope. Me, I went to the fields to cut grass that day. Walking along the ridge, I fell backwards into a ditch and went to sleep. Lucky there wasn't any water in it, Boss Liu! My liver was damaged for a whole week after that. Then later I heard this old brother of mine died at forty-three. Alcoholic liver disease! Me, I haven't touched a drop since. But you enjoy your drink, Boss Liu!”